Things I want to know about Miyagi — 90
Translated by KaiesV
Edited by KaiesV
I hugged Miyagi.
That was only about two weeks ago, not that much time had passed.
But what had been a vivid memory is rapidly blurring, and the feeling in my arms is so uncertain that I can’t remember.
Miyagi was quiet in my arms that day, but I don’t think that will ever happen again.
In that light, perhaps I should have committed the feel of Miyagi more firmly to memory.
I wish I had lined up and tucked away my memories too, in the chest that contained her cut-and-sew and blouse.
I may be very sick thinking about such things.
I hate it.
It is still early in the evening and I am working through a problem book when I roll my pen across my desk.
The pen rolls over the notebook and stops when it hits the textbook.
Due to the fact that the final exam is coming soon after the midterms are over and I don’t have time to relax, I am spending more time at my desk.
I feel like I’m studying all the time, but it’s not my imagination because I’m actually studying all the time.
Add to that the event of an entrance exam, and it is indeed a depressing time.
I don’t dislike studying, but I wish the event of taking an entrance exam would be over as soon as possible.
But once the exams are over, comes the graduation ceremony where I have a promise to Miyagi.
Now I do not want to lose sight of Miyagi.
I touch the pendant, which Miyagi no longer touches very often.
Although the pendant was checked by either being ordered to undo the third button on my blouse myself or by Miyagi, the number of times she touched it was decreasing.
For that, I am made to cook.
I don’t want to be touched by the pendant, but I also don’t feel comfortable not being touched.
The pendant, which resembles a cursed item that cannot be removed once it is put on, has been binding me for a long time.
It seems to me that this pendant makes me think a lot of nonsense.
I lightly slap both cheeks to break the stagnant air.
I get up and open the curtains just a little.
I look at the window and see large raindrops beating in the wind.
The sound of rain, which had been heard before the study began, had become much louder and was joined by the sound of wind.
The sound is so frightening in a quiet room that I wish it would get colder and turn to snow.
I sit down in my chair and pick up my phone.
What is Miyagi doing at a time like this
On the day she called me, no one other than Miyagi was in that house when I left.
I don’t know who her parents are and why they are always gone.
And I didn’t know if Miyagi, who said she was scared, would be scared on a night like this.
I start up my messaging app and display Miyagi’s name.
After a little hesitation, I make the call.
The ringing increases two or three times.
After six rings, I gave up and was about to hang up when I heard Miyagi’s voice.
「Yeah, that’s right.」
「What is it at this hour」
What, you may ask
To put it bluntly, I made a call I had no business making.
But if I told Miyagi that as it is, she would be angry.
「It’s a bad day, isn’t it Miyagi, you might be scared, so I thought you’re shaking.」
I said as lightly as possible what happened that led to the call.
「I’m not that scared of them.
What I don’t like is gho… No, it’s just horror movies and TV shows, and I don’t mind rain and wind.」
「What about lightning」
「I’m not good at it, but I’m not afraid of it.」
She said she was afraid of ghosts, but it seems true that she was not afraid of some wind and rain, and she do not seem frightened on the other end of the phone.
That is something to rejoice about, but then I don’t know what to talk about with Miyagi.
I just wanted to hear her voice.
I was just a little worried.
I don’t mean to say that, nor do I think that.
Maybe, surely, I don’t think.
But I don’t want to hang up the phone after having made the call.
「Are you home alone right now」
Before the short-tempered Miyagi starts fussing about hanging up the phone, he fills the silence, which is likely to be long.
But nothing is heard from the phone.
I guess that’s not a good question.
Miyagi rarely talks about herself.
And if you ask her, she deflects the conversation.
I almost regret that I shouldn’t have asked the question I just did, but then I hear Miyagi’s little voice.
「Are you always alone at night」
「My parents, they hardly ever come home.」
I thought not, but for the first time I hear her family’s story from her own mouth.
I don’t know why she answered me, but I think it is unusual.
「Does the two of them work」
「Sendai-san, don’t you have something to tell me」
Miyagi’s voice lowered a little, as if it was a question she did not want to answer.
I could sense that she did not want to answer any more questions, so I had no choice but to tell her frankly.
The conversation is cut short, and the only sounds in the room are the rain and wind coming from outside the window.
There are other questions I want to ask him, but Miyagi becomes visibly grumpy when I try to ask her about the university.
For example, if I say college now, she must hang up the phone.
I think it was unbalanced.
I seem to be the only one leaning toward Miyagi, and I can’t seem to balance it out.
But even as I lament this, Miyagi doesn’t speak except what she wants to speak, and the silence continues.
And if the silence continues, Miyagi is likely to hang up the phone without me asking about the university.
As expected, I don’t want her to hang up unilaterally, so I tell her myself.
「I think we should hang up now.」
Then, it’s a goodnight.
I was about to continue, but my words were interrupted by Miyagi.
「Sendai-san, tell me something more.
I’m not scared, but it’s so loud out there.」
Miyagi said as if to excuse herself, then added,「I guess, there’s none.」She immediately denied it.
「No, it’s not like I have none.
I’ll talk to you some more.」
「What are you going to tell me」
「Miyagi doesn’t have to answer if you don’t want to, but is there a reason I can’t call your given name」
One of the things I’ve been wondering about, and I’m going to mention something bland.
「Only my friends call me Shiori.」
I knew that was the case.
Me and Miyagi are not friends.
The answer I was expecting was not happy to be right.
「If we become friends, then can you call me like that」
I pose another question to the uninteresting answer, but Miyagi does not reply.
Instead, she called my name, saying,「Hazuki, you mean」
My heart skips a beat at being called something I’ve rarely been called.
But it’s just a word punctuated by a funny point, and the question sticks.
「——Who will call you Only with friends」
Miyagi can call me like that too.」
「I’m not a friend, nor am I your parent.」
「I knew you would say that.」
Just like saying good morning in the morning, Miyagi has a certain thing to say at these times.
It’s like the standard fast food menu.
Words that denigrate friends will not disappear from Miyagi.
I am not obsessed with the idea of friends, so I don’t mind the negativity, but it doesn’t make me feel any better.
The necklace, are you wearing right now」
This line of dialogue is also close to standard.
Miyagi often checks to see if I am wearing a pendant.
「I’m wearing it.」
「Touch it right now.」
Miyagi may have touched the pendant unilaterally, but she had never asked me to touch it myself.
So I couldn’t help but ask back.
It was said so naturally that I followed it as if it were natural to do so, but now is not the time to be commanded.
But it’s not enough to say no, and I decide to take Miyagi at her word.
I place my hand on the hoodie I am wearing in my loungewear, around where the pendant is.
After stroking there lightly and telling her that I had「touched it,」Miyagi immediately said,
「Are you touching them directly, not over your clothes」
「Is Miyagi setting up surveillance cameras or something in my room」
「That can’t be true.
I mean, you didn’t touch it properly.
Touch it directly.」
「I touched it, though.」
I put my hand through the neck of my loose-fitting hoodie and directly touch the chain of the pendant.
Perhaps because the room is warm, neither my hand nor the chain is cold.
I slowly slide my fingers over it as Miyagi does.
I ignore the small resistance I feel on my fingertips and stroke the chain with my skin toward the pendant top.
I’m not ticklish, but I don’t even think I’m touching myself.
I exhale thinly, feeling somewhat restless.
「Are you touching it properly」
「I was already touching it.」
The sound of Miyagi’s voice makes me feel a little strange.
It should be my own fingers, but I feel as if Miyagi is touching me.
I’m a little breathless.
My fingertips feel the small bumps in the chain more than they should.
「Are you sure」
The voice from the phone caresses my ears and shivers my eardrums.
I could even hear Miyagi’s breathing, and I blocked it all out with my own voice.
「Shall I send you a video of it」
「I don’t want it and you don’t need to touch it anymore.」
When I stop stroking the chain, Miyagi continues to speak to keep me from speaking.
「Sendai-san, I’m ending the call.」
When I said this, Miyagi replied,「Gold night,」in a voice so small that it was almost lost in the sound of the rain and wind.